The first thing to keep in mind is to not get hung up so much on precise minutes (7:17 Cake, 7:20 Garter, etc.).  Set a start time when it all begins and estimate other key times but really what's most important is the order and grouping of events.  Once the itinerary (order) has been set and the clock has started, your ceremony/reception will develop a natural flow on it's own and it's important to allow for flexibility in timing.  Your DJ plays a huge part in keeping things on track and will coordinate elements with all those involved (you, photographer, caterer, etc) so that you don't have to worry about what's next and can simply enjoy being with friends and family.

Here's a description of what to expect for each traditional element of an (on-site) wedding ceremony and reception.  It's presented in a typical order that tends to work for most couples but of course you'll have to decide what works best for you.  Certain elements naturally group well together allowing the ability to maximize dance time and prevent guests from feeling fragmented.

On-Site Ceremony:  Set a start time for the actual ceremony and schedule your DJ a full half hour prior.  This way, the DJ's in place, appropriately dressed and can have some nice music playing as guests are arriving and being seated.  Even if you are planning on live music, you may want to consider having your DJ provide a small sound system with a microphone so that guests can actually hear the service. 

Cocktail Hour:  This is a time for your guests to socialize with each other and enjoy refreshments and hors de oeuvres.  Your photographer may use this time to take after-ceremony pictures of you and perhaps the bridal party.  Many couples have chosen to forego or limit taking pictures during this time so they too can join in the cocktail hour.  It's perfectly acceptable for your guests to see you and the bridal party prior to the introductions.

Introductions:  Introductions go a long way in setting the tone for the rest of your reception.  Some couples want to keep things somewhat low-key and simple, sometimes opting to only have themselves introduced.  Other's want to create something a little more lively and upbeat to include their parents and/or bridal party.  Many are choosing to really raise the roof with a high energy approach.  Think about what best suits the personalities of your bridal party and guests and choose which approach that works best for you.  When it's time, your DJ will come out to where you're gathered getting everyone lined up and ready to be introduced..

First Dance: The trend has been to do the first dance right after the introductions.  You can opt to dance the entire song with just the two of you or invite only parents to join, invite only bridal party to join, or invite parents and bridal party to join in together.  It's suggested that if you're doing the first dance after the introductions, that we don't invite other guests to join in as by the time they make it to the dance floor, the song's nearly over. 

Welcoming: Traditionally done by the host or hostess (typically father of the bride) as a way of welcoming and thanking all your guests for being there.  They may want to acknowledge contributions of key people or perhaps share a short anecdote about the bride and groom or formally welcome the joining of two families.  The welcoming could incorporate a toast but it's not typical.  Some couples do the welcoming themselves.  Others opt to forego this altogether.

Blessing:  Often done by whomever officiated the ceremony, but it doesn't necessarily have to be.  It can be a family member or a close friend.  Whomever you choose, make sure you give them notice ahead of time so that they're not caught off guard when called upon.  The blessing typically is not just about the food and usually includes blessing of the gathering making it appropriate to have it right before toasts. Some couples opt to have a special cultural blessing i.e. blessing over the bread and wine (motzi). Other couples forego the blessing altogether.

Toasts:  Traditionally done by the best man and maid/matron of honor, but others can be included as well.  Some couples decide to open the microphone up to any guest who would like to step up and offer a toast.  For maximum attentiveness, the toast would typically take place prior to the onset of the meal, but sometimes is done between courses or right before/after the cake cutting.  If whomever's giving the toast could use a little guidance, may we suggest having them visit InstantWeddingToasts.com.

Dinner Service:  Typically consists of either a buffet, seated service, or food stations and will really be a great time for you to relax and get off your feet a bit.  Most likely, you'll be served first and you should really allow yourself this time to relax and enjoy your meal. You may feel pulled in many different directions but definitely make it a point to eat so that you can keep that energy level up (you'll need it!).  When done, or perhaps in between courses, you may want to take this time to freshen up or visit guests tables.

Visiting Tables:  This is a great time for you to touch base with each or at least most of your guests, especially if you are not having a receiving line.  Keep in mind just how long it will take to make the rounds.  Do the math - if you have 15 tables and you spend 1 minute at each table, that'll take 15 minutes.  2 minutes at each table will take a half-hour, 3 minutes at table...you see where we're going here.  You may want to consider starting with the tables of guests that you've had the least amount of contact with and work your way up.

Getting things started:  You and your guests have just had a great meal and you're feeling like it's time to get things started.  The thing is, not everyone will reach that level at exactly the same time.  Your DJ will keep an eye on the room and will be able to sense when it's time to move on to the next item on the agenda.  We don't want to rush your guests, but we don't want to have them sitting around becoming restless.  Your DJ and team will coordinate with you and your other vendors the precise moment for getting things started.

Parents Dances:    Best done right after the meal as a way to draw the attention away from the table to the dance floor.  Typically includes a separate song for father/daughter and mother/son but many couples have chosen to use the same song for both dancing simultaneously. We'll want to have your guests surrounding the dance floor so they're focused on this very special moment.  Your song choice doesn't have to be slow and sappy but should definitely be something that has or gives meaning to you and Mom and/or Dad.

Dance Set:  Let the dancing begin!  How we approach your particular group will really depend on our discussions, music requests, dynamics of the guests and general vibe of the room.  Typically, we'll want to start programming music that's catered a little bit more towards your older guests although there's a lot of great music out there that have multi-generational appeal that we're confident can get everyone young and old moving.  As the evening progresses so too will the music providing a little bit of something for everyone.  Keep in mind, you're going to be the center of attention and it would go a long way to getting your guests involved in dancing if you two are out there as well.

Anniversary Dance:  A great way to end the first dance set, this is when all married couples (including you two!) are invited to the dance floor.  The DJ will have an appropriate song playing (your choice or ours) and will announce any couple married less then 1 year, please step to the side.  Any couple married less then 2 years, 5 years, 10 years and such will then be asked to step aside.  Through the process of elimination, we'll determine who's been married the longest over a round of applause, get together with the newlyweds to offer advice and for pictures..  Sometimes couples will have the anniversary dance in lieu of a bouquet/garter throw offering the bouquet to the winning couple.

Cake Cutting:  At the scheduled time, your DJ will invite everyone to gather around as you get ready to cut the cake.  Most times the cake cutting takes place after the first dance set but sometimes is done right after the meal especially in the interest of preserving dance time.  The caterer, coordinator, attendant or photographer will guide you through the steps in slicing the cake and may even pose you for a bit for pictures.  Most couples are pretty civil about feeding each other the cake - some of course smash it to it each others faces.  You may want to talk about this beforehand so not to catch anyone by unexpected and perhaps undesired surprise. Your caterer will need time to slice and present the cake so on to the next event.

Bouquet Toss:  If you decide that you want to toss the bouquet, we'll invite all the single ladies to the dance floor to catch the specially appointed throw away bouquet.  On the count of three, the bride tosses the bouquet behind her keeping in mind distance and obstacles (lights, low ceiling, etc.).  Let your DJ know the name of that person who caught the bouquet so that she can be invited back when it comes time to receive the garter if doing so.

Garter Removal:  A chair is brought to the middle of the dance floor and the bride is seated in it.  The groom then positions himself in front of her often getting down to one knee and slowly removes the pre-arranged garter that the bride will have put on her right leg.  Choose a song that's fun for you or we can default to something very appropriate.  We'll always use good taste and avoid any potentially embarrassing commentary or approach.  Some couples opt not to do the garter removal but still choose to do the bouquet toss.  Some forego both altogether.

Garter Toss:  Single men are now invited to the dance floor and with the groom's back towards the men, will throw the garter on the count of three.  It's suggested that you actually toss the garter behind you and not to try to flick it like a rubber band unless you happen to have a super elastic garter.  More often then not, flicking the garter comes up short. 

Garter Placement:  Traditionally, whoever catches the bouquet and garter are invited back to the dance floor where the lady who caught the bouquet is seated.  The bride and groom are invited to stand behind them as the gentleman who caught the garter positions himself in front of the lady and on cue, moves the garter up her left leg.  Once he reaches the stop point, the man then slowly takes it back down.  The garter is his to keep.

Cultural Dance:  If doing so, now's a great time to do the apron dance, tarantella or a hora as a way to reenergize the dance floor.  If not, your DJ will have something programmed to get everyone back to dancing.

Last Dance:  This typically is scheduled about 10-15 prior to the end of the reception and most times is a slower song but it doesn't have to be!  We'll invite you two out to start things off (if you're not already out there!) and have everyone else join in.  Some couples forego having a specific last dance altogether, it's really a matter of personal preference  Once the last dance has finished, we'll play a couple of great "end of the night" songs bringing the celebration to a nice close. 
 

Typical 5 Hour Timeline (with-on site ceremony)       00:00 Arrival of the guests       00:30 Ceremony Begins       01:00 Ceremony Ends       01:00 Receiving Line       01:00 Reception Begins       01:00 Cocktail Hour       02:00 Guests seated for dinner       02:05 Introductions       02:10 Bride and Groom First Dance       02:15 Welcoming/Blessing/Toasts       02:30 Dinner Service       03:00 Father/Daughter Mother/Son Dance       03:10 Dance Set       03:45 Cake Cutting/Bouquet/Garter/Apron Dance       04:00 Dance Set       04:45 Last Dance       05:00 Reception Ends

So there you have it in a nutshell. The thing to remember most is to relax and soak it all in.  The day is going to go by like a whirlwind and surprises will happen.  Don't sweat the small stuff and by this point, it's all small stuff.  Remember, true wedding professionals do this stuff all the time and are there to guide you along the way so that you can relax, dance, be with your friends and family and celebrate being a newly married couple.